I was on Skype with my best friend, laying on my bed in my bra and short shorts because my room gets nice and warm. I was still wearing my favorite half-finger gloves, for the first time in over a year I'd gotten to use my punching bag again, unfortunately since it was the first time in awhile I threw a punch wrong and ended up with a sensitive knuckle that felt much nicer with the gloves on.
I was only using my punching bag again in fear that he might be crazy enough to show up. I was terrified of him, he'd never been violent before but I could see he wasn't right in the head. It was a funny coincidence (if you believe in such thing) that he chose to show up that night.
I kinda froze, I tried to convince myself the sounds outside my room were only my large dogs moving around, I'd been scared a few night's because I'd hear them. But this time was different. I recognized the sound too much to say it was something else, though I still hadn't convinced myself it wasn't just my dad. I sat up and positioned laptop so my friend on Skype could see the room clearly.
The door was pushed open, I still wasn't sure if it was my dad or not. If it was I'd feel embarrassed to be caught on Skype late at night with a boy, only wearing my bra and shorts. But it wasn't and I was kinda thankful for that, but I was paralyzed in fear.
He walked in, saying "Hi" shyly and causing my stomach to drop. It still took another endless second to be sure it was him as he stepped into the light. I could not move.
He smiled at me like he was supposed to be there, and then glared at my laptop. My friend was asking what was going on, so I turned to him with a plastered on smile and with an almost sarcastic calm I introduced them.I was holding my favorite little Swiss Army knife and asking over and over "Didn't I tell you that if you showed up I'd stab you?" He said he didn't care. I didn't plan on stabbing him, but I made sure to always be holding the knife.
He talked to me, I tried to listen and not shake. I didn't think to get dressed, not that I would have really cared to anyway. I remember I tried to talk to him, he was going through a hard time, he thought he got a girl pregnant, he was sure he was gonna be a dad, he was scared. Apparently there was a lot going on for him. I only heard half of it.
He tried to sit on my bed, to which I responded by stepping onto my bed and kicking him off. Of course my weak kicks didn't do much, but they eventually got him to get off. I vaguely remember something about him saying he loved me, and I think that's what caused me to punch him the first time. A few punches, less focused than the ones I'd given my punching bag, to the ribs. And after I calmed down he told me I would not have gotten so angry if I didn't love him too. So I punched him more, this time he grabbed me by the wrists to make me stop (something that he'd done a few times while we were together as well, though I'd never punched him before). My friend on Skype saw that and yelled some choice words at him. Once he wasn't gabbing my arms anymore I paced away, trying not to rub my arms too much and show that they hurt. My friend was asking if I was alright, he was still talking, everything started to blur and I was trying so hard not to yell at both of them to shut up and leave me alone.
I paced a bit and calmed down. He was sitting on the ground now. He started blaming me for what happened. I was sick of it. I brought up my knee to the side of his head. He didn't respond. My friend claims that he ended up laying down and I was kicking and stomping on him, if I did that then I don't remember it. I went back to pacing at some point. He said something that caused me to nearly shout "Get Out!"
As he stepped through the door I heard him mumble something that sounded like him saying "my pleasure". I think I heard him mumble something and I might have caught the word "bitch" as he turned back after stepping out the door. I kicked the door shut in his face.
I'm not a violent person. I promise I'm gentle. There's just very little proof of that in this post.
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